Dating tips from Phish.

I had a hell of a weekend. It was very long. And alcohol fuelled. I haven't had the lovely combo of a weekend off, and an excess pay week in a loooong time.

So I went out an let my hair down. Long story short, I hooked up with someone, and gave them my number, expecting to meet up with him sometime during the week and finish what we started.

Good plan huh? One teensy, tiny problem. I bumped into his randomly in Westfield last night. And we went for coffee. Then we went and sat in the park for a bit and watched the cats, and talked. About his ex. Alot. Then he told me about every girl he's been with since then.

• Guys, take note. Talking about your ex is not good first date conversation. Going into detail about the whole relationship, not a good idea.

I changed the subject. We began discussing nice areas in Sydney. I asked if he'd ever been to the mountains. He said no, we'd have to go up there some time.

• Guys, take note. First dates are for assessing chemistry, not planning futures.
  

Then he proceeds to tell me that you cannot trust Asians. In a very, very derogatory way. My roomie is Chinese, her boyfriend is Vietnamese. Several of my close friends at work are Asian. Fufuxake! My best friend is a gay black Asian.

I don't do prejudice. Full stop. Exclamation mark, exclamation mark, exclamation mark.

• Guys, take note. If you want to have sex with a girl, be flexible with your statements. She may not be flexible with hers, and you want to keep her happy.
  

He walked me halfway home, then we said goodbye. As I walked off he called me his love, several times.

• Guys, take note. DO NOT DO THIS!!!!
  

Have you ever heard the saying 'running screaming for the hills'? Well, I'm in the hills, and I'm still screaming.

Seriously, I'd prefer SR, in all of his indifferent c*ntishness, to this clingy, racist bugger.

This is for any comments about the smut post below. Just so we don't interrupt the story.

Interactive

Its Smut weekend. And I haven't got anything written. My bad. Its not that I've been uninspired. In fact, I've been mightily inspired, and I will be again in a few days. But right now I have neither the time or the inclination to write it.

So I'll leave it up to you guys. Each reader gets to submit a bit. And you can do what you will with it. But don't hog the storyline, please keep your additions to a paragraph if you can.

I'll begin.

******

A storm was rolling in. Wendy glanced up. What a perfect end to the night. Her date was a bust. There was no conversation. No chemistry. She doubted if he could even get it up if she had gone home with him. Which he didn't offer. She couldn't beleive she didn't wear underwear for the night. Bastard was a waste of her time.

He seemed nice when they met a t the party. Tall, quiet but gentlemanly. She must have been pretty drunk. He wasn't tall. He wasn't quiet either. Oh no, he was absolutely silent. She would have wondered if he was a mute, but his staccato answers guaranteed otherwise. An he was certainly not gentlemanly. He spent the entire evening staring at her tits, and then made her pay the bill!

She shivered out of anger, frustration and cold. The wind eddied leaves around her ankles, and they scratched as they twisted against her skin. Mark was going to pick her up. Sweet, reliable Mark. But she'd opted to walk away from her lecherous date and have Mark pick her up out on the street. She wondered how long he'd be. It began to rain.

She ducked under a tree and hoped Mark would show up before the lightning moved in too. The drops fell thick and fast. She was well and truly soaked, cold and shivering, before headlights turned into the street.

*****

Over to you guys. Do what you will.

I need a patch!

Seriously peoples. A patch for the internet. So that next time it dies, I won't be left completely, and utterly cut off.

My wireless internet adapter died. It worked when I went to bed on Monday, but didn't when I got home from work on Tuesday. On closer inspection it would seem that the entire card (in the casing) had been disconnected from the pins. In short, it had been dropped. And I was the sucker who had to fork out $60 to replace it, so I could update my beloved blog.

35 emails. 7 scrabble games to play. 150 blogs. 34+ comments. One tag (that I know of).

In three days! Kitty, do you know you've done 15 posts in that amount of time! If they make the internet patch, I'll send you a spare in case your internet dies too!

*****

Where did sitemeter go? Its been three days and I jumped on to check my stats, and it's gone away. I was almost at 15000 visits!

Is anyone else having this problem?

*****

I wore make up to work today. I rarely wear make up. And I was talking to one of the guys and he literally did a double take, without the look away bit. Funniest thing I've seen in ages!

*****

I shopped tonight. I have new jammies. Funky ones of course. Just a singlet and boxer combo, but oh-so cute!

And a new bra set. And a hot new top. In a size down from what I normally buy there.

*****

There's a storm moving in so I should go. Catch y'all laterz.