Wednesday, August 31, 2005

What went wrong with today

I think it would be quicker to tell you about what went right. I had today all planned out, looking after my breeders first, then going into my main areas, with time left over for a massive joint cleaning session.

I had to count a co-workers animals, because he's on holidays and, because it’s the end of the month, I had to do what is best described as a monthly summary. I got more animals than he had at his last count, only no more had arrived between then and now. I couldn't use our record book because he uses his differently to what I’m used to. Then when I thought I had it all worked out, there were more deceased animals on the cards than on any records, and the ones in the records weren't matching the days that some of the cards indicated dead animals were discovered.

So naturally trying to wrap my head around this put me back a few hours. I went from there into my usual areas but I barely had time to do the change, which was supposed to have been done yesterday. I never got time to do my share of the joint cleaning. After this I had three other areas to check, and I had to call someone to get them into the facility to instruct them on applying some relief cream to some tails (gotta love working in an institution). She was supposed to come down just after morning tea, but she ended up arriving when we were supposed to be finishing everything off. And I still have to monitor her animals very closely because I have the very deep, very well based suspicion that she’s going to ignore everything I told her today. And during all of this I kept getting my supervisor coming in and telling me that I'd missed this; or to not do this job, do this instead: and why was this box left here, its been there for two or three days now (I’d had Monday off, so I’d only been at work two days, and checked that area once this week). Just one of those frustrating days.

At least I can laugh at the mouse bite on my thumb. Hurts like hell.

Sunday, August 28, 2005


Today I saw lions, and tigers, and there were giraffes, and zebras. And not that many trees. Thus I went to Kenya.

Thursday, August 25, 2005


"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame. Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver." ~ Jack Handy
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.
"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. " ~Frank Sinatra
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." ~ Henny Youngman
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not." ~ Stephen Wright
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven!" ~ Brian O'Rourke
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." ~ Benjamin Franklin
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza." ~ Dave Barry
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can! ~ Dave Howell
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin, of Cheers. One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. Here's how it went: "Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

"You Look Like a Wingnut"

You know how there are moments that you think something totally inappropriate and it makes you want to act accordingly... well, today I was in a meeting with my boss. As he was looking at me and I thought 'you look like a wingnut' (not sure why, he doesn't even has big ears). Almost cracking up, I then had the thought that what if life was really like pop-up-video, and a huge thought bubble (complete with blue edging) erupted out of my head with that statement in it. With this visual haunting my mind, I couldn't keep the smirk off my face. My boss must have thought I had lost it.
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid. Aoccdrnig to rscheearch taem at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Such a cdonition is arppoiately cllaed Typoglycemia :)-
Amzanig huh? Yaeh and yuo awlyas thought slpeling was ipmorant.

Wednesday, August 17, 2005


I was walking home from work this arvo, and I had a random memory from my uni days.

Four of us had gone into town to do some shopping/waste time. We borrowed a friends car, and it broke down while we were there. So we called someone to come in and pick us up. Meanwhile the driver had gotten the car going, so he took it back while it was still running. Teharne and I had elected to stay back in case the guy who was picking us up had already left. Now this guy is notoriously slow. And after 10 minutes of waiting we came up with a game. We tried to guess the colour of the next car to come around the corner we were standing on. I picked white, and Teharne picked red. Of course after three yellow cars and no red ones had gone by she'd change her mind and guess yellow. *Cue the red cars*. It got to the point where, when one of the colour cars we'd guessed came round the corner, we'd lean in together, stand up stright, and 'golf clap', congratulating the car as it went by. Naturally as soon as the car began to accelerate away we cracked up laughing.

That also happened to be the day that a stack of uni students were going this way and that, on that exact corner. Heaps of random fun. And no, we weren't drunk. This acticity kept us entertained for about half and hour. Uni was a 10 minute drive away.

Saturday, August 13, 2005

My Sad Life

Its so sad. But since I've moved to Sydney I can count the number of times I've been in physical contact with people

Four hugs
One pat on the back
One accidental touching of hands with a work colleague

I miss my uni mates. They give goodest hugs.

Sunday, August 07, 2005

How do you furnish a house for less than $500?

Answer: St Vinnies (or other similar charity stores) and discount stores (for the new stuff).

Wardrobe $60
Desk $55
Dining table and 4 chairs $75
Sofa Bed $120
Coffee Table $30
Phone Table (New) $20
Chest of Drawers (New) $80
Entertainment Unit (New) $50
TOTAL $490

This doesn’t count tableware ($40 for a complete 8 person setting – plates, bowls, cups, mugs, saucers, bread plates, and cutlery), or pots/pans/kettle/toaster ($8 a piece), or the stuff that I already had.
My mattress cost more than my entire furnished house. But it’s a bloody good one.
I am proud of myself. Bargain hunting runs in my genes.

The shape of my future

You know how there’s always one teacher from school or high school that makes an impression on you. I’ve been thinking about my version of this teacher a lot over the last few days. He was my biology teacher in year 12. He was the teacher that would explain everything once and I’d just get it. No matter how difficult the topic. What made this teacher really special is that he would go the extra mile. I was looking at going to the University of Queensland in 2002. And I put in my application as per normal. Then I started looking for accommodation. I found this place I really wanted, not to expensive, not too seedy, but the closing date was the day before. I was so upset. Living two states away at the time, it wasn’t like I could go up to Queensland to check out rental places until I actually moved up there either. I went into school (this was after exams had finished mind you, I wasn’t his responsibility anymore) to talk to our careers counselor. I dropped by his office to say hi and, when he asked how I was, I told him what was going on, almost ending up in tears. He told me to go see the careers counselor and got the number off me for this place.
I couldn’t find the careers counselor, so I left messages where she might be. Then I returned to the office. He had just gotten off the phone to the accommodation place and they had agreed to accept my application. I ended up getting offered a room at this place too, but unfortunately (or fortunately in the long run) I didn’t get accepted into the course I wanted. The thing is, this guy was the vice principal of the school, and he could have easily said I wasn’t his responsibility anymore, or that it was my problem, or that he had other, more important stuff to do. But he didn’t.
The reason I’m telling this story is that something has struck me about my job recently. I knew when I accepted the job offer, that an animal tech had no prospects of going anywhere. But it really hit home the other day when we were sitting in the staff room at tea break talking about the job, and one of my colleagues stated ‘when you become an animal tech, that’s all you’ll be. The job goes nowhere. You’ll stay an animal tech forever.’ It really struck me, forever is a long time to be shitkicking. So I’m thinking about sticking at this job for a bit (a few years), and then going and doing vet science. I figure that much faith in my potential can’t be blind.

Thursday, August 04, 2005

The Pizza Never Lies

I can't beleive its been two weeks since my last post. I saw 'the bridge' for the first time at night, I had a birthday, I moved, I drove in heavy traffic in the city(ish region, but still bloody good for me). But I'm not going to expand on any of that here. If anybody cares you can ask questions.

I spent last night going through my pictures on my computer. I have shitloads. And some of them are darn weird. I figure that if I use some of the random things thast garfield says can make really good msn names... or blog titles. I came home last night and one of the goats out the back had its horns tangled in the fence. So I had to ring the real estate agent to get them to contact the landlord so that someone could come down and fix it. bloody goats gotten throught he fence again this afternoon, but its not caught. If it wanders from one side of the yard to another its fine, but if it gets into trouble I'd be all ready to jump the (6 foot high) fence to fix it. Not quite sure how I'd do it, but I can climb fences at need. I learnt at least one useful skill at uni.

Anyhoo. I've decided that when I have no interesting news to post I will post a pretty picture or something to amuse my readers. *Sigh* I have no life, unless you all want to hear about my cat.