Tuesday, February 28, 2006

In my pants

I got this as an email a couple of months ago, and recently found it in my inbox again. What this is, is the title of the current song your listening to, and follow it up with ‘in my pants’. I'm hoping to get alot of songs into peoples pants.

I Am Hated in my pants
Smells Like Teen Spirit in my pants.
Oops I did it again in my pants
I just wanna live in my pants
lose yourself in my pants
All The Small Things in my pants
beat it in my pants
my girlfriend is a man in my pants
Something That Produces Results in my pants
Where'd you go in my pants
How Does It Feel in my pants
Swing Life Away in my pants
If I Didn't Have You in my pants
I'll never love again in my pants
Lucky day in my pants
Sk8er Boi in my pants
Mr Brightside in my pants
Lonely No More in my pants
Feeler in my pants
boulavard of broken dreams in my pants
the prayer in my pants
Not listening to anything in my pants
World's Most Hansome Man in my pants
Jerk it out in my pants
Someones Watchin Over Me in my pants
What makes u different makes u beautiful in my pants
I touch myself in my pants
I'm feelin' this in my pants
Tilt your head back in my pants
Who's that girl in my pants
Never Really Was in my pants
Kiss and Make Up in my pants
Rising Force in my pants
rubber ducky.. in my pants
Im shakin' in my pants
All that i've got in my pants
Eat it in my pants
Have a Nice Day in My pants
The special 2 in my pants
Personal space invader in my pants.
Why is love so hard to find in my pants
So hot right now in my pants
toy soldiers in my pants
Im lost without u in my pants
1 2 step in my pants
Do somethin' in my pants
smile like you mean it in my pants
rock the boat in my pants
don’t u want somebody to love in my pants
you shook me all night long in my pants
Papercut in my pants
could i be you in my pants
lets get retarded in my pants
i believe in a thing called love in my pants
Shes no you in my pants!
Stop The Music in my pants
dont phunk with my heart in my pants
I hope you dance in my pants
You can't touch this in my pants
like that in my pants
show me the meaning of being lonely in my pants
Nobody's Listening in my pants
Dont wana miss a thing in my pants
You and Me in my pants
Clubbed to death in my pants
take my hand in my pants
Your body is a wonderland in my pants
Hallelujah in my pants
Amazed in my pants (and then easy in my pants)
I believe in miracles in my pants

Monday, February 27, 2006

Goddamn motor vehicle registry

I went to the RTA on Saturday to get my license transferred interstate, and at the same time get my new car transferred into my name, by transferring a rather large sum of cash into their name. Can’t be done. I haven’t bought the appropriate proof of address. That’s ok. Next time I come back bring proof of address, and we’ll transfer the license, and use that as proof of address to transfer the car.

Turn up at about 10 this morning. There aren’t as many people as Saturday. Still quite a few, but at least I can find a seat. The numbers are being called up quickly too. “I’m glad I’ve done my make up, this should go pretty smoothly”. HA!

Three numbers get called in a row, all at the same desk. My number is the last of them. Hooray. I only had to wait 20 minutes. But the person at that desk was pushing the button, and yelling the number, then pushing the button again to bring up the next number. So by the time I get there, (and I’m not slow), there is already someone there. OK. I’ll just wait. More numbers are getting called this entire time. I approach another service window. The person there says she’ll serve the people she just called up, and then deal with me. I can handle that. Minor hiccup. The original lady finishes serving. I’ll go over there. She hasn’t called anybody up. That’s a good sign.

When she turns back from talking to the person next to her, I tell her that my number was missed. The transaction starts with her demanding what I want. It continues on with her taking my licence and telling me that I’m on a P2, even though my license says it’s an open, and she tells me I’m wrong for trying to point this out. I’ve held a Victorian license previously. When I am unable to present it because its standard policy to surrender a license when you move interstate, she grabs a piece of paper, fills it out and walks off. Leaving me standing there like a spare dick at a wedding.

She comes back, and with no explanation of what she’d just wandered off to do, she picks up the next piece of paperwork. The proof of address is in the form itself. She picks it up, and tears of a note that was stapled to the bill. That note needed to be attached to the bill for a very important reason. When I interrupt her to ask when she expects a response, she just says it’ll be back by tomorrow. How silly of me to ask that. I’m working for the next 11 days solid. So I can only guess where that piece of paper is going to be by the time I get back there.

She then turns to the person next to her and starts helping them serve their customer. How rude is that! She turns her attention back to my paperwork, and quotes a number at me. I have no idea that she’s even talking to me right there. She quotes the number again. I register she’s talking to me, but I have no idea what she’s talking about. She looks at me, and the penny drops. How nice of her to say ‘That’ll be $###, how would you like to pay?’ I tell her I want it on the plastic, on savings. She just quotes the number at me again. I pick up the bank card and hold it up saying ‘SAVINGS’. Ok. She pushes the eftpos machine at me. Screw that. I push my card at her. She can fucking swipe it by now. She swipes the card, and wanders off with my license and electricity bill. Doesn’t even tell me to enter my pin. When she gets back she leans over and helps serve another persons customer AGAIN! Seeing red by now. When the payment is processed she prints a receipt, and pushes it at me through the window. She doesn’t even say goodbye or have a nice day. I lean over the counter and say, voice all honey like ‘have a nice day’, just to get at her, and she doesn’t even acknowledge me.

I walked out of there extremely unhappy with her. And went to Australia post to pay a bill. Walk in there and the line is to the door. GRRR. I’m about ready to hit the person in front of me from sheer frustration. But the line advances quickly and within less than 5 minutes I’m being served. The lady serving me didn’t smile at me, and she wasn’t overly chatty, but she was polite. She didn’t worry that I tried to exceed my EFTPOS limit. Can I do a split payment? No worries. When the transaction was done she waited for me to get organized, put my paperwork in my bag, and turn away before calling the next person up. Australia post gets a pretty bad rap sometimes, but I’ve never had any problems with them. And compared to the RTA they’re perfect.

One bit that really got to me about the way that biotch handled that case – I was talking to the guy on Saturday, and he looked at the issue dates and all on my license. And he told me all I needed was a proof of address. He acknowledged that it was an open license, and he saw the issue date.

Saturday, February 25, 2006

A post concerning girly toys

Hurrah! I've been waiting so very long for this to happen. And it finally has. I bought a NEW car. So its not NEW new, but its not even 18 months old. Im so excited. I was on the phone about 3 minutes before leaving work and I was doing the toilet dance, without the need to pee.

The guy I'm living with works for that holden dealership. So they were all willing to cut down on all types of costs. $1000 trade in for my car (which is worth maybe $100), but they didn't class it as a trade in. To save me $30 on stamp duty. They were going to offer me finance at a reduced rate, except for the fact that I'd already gotten the finance. And when they gave me a quote for insurance, they gave me $100 off the price. Just because I knew this guy. So this car which is currently valued at $20300, cost me $17990.

Without further ado, I present to you *car yet to be named*













*Will post piccytures asap.*

Ok, So I have no actual photos of my car. I was going to take photos with my BRAND NEW camera phone. But it didn't come with a USB cable. So that idea went to hell in a barbed wire canoe. But I like my phone. Bought it outright, because I couldn't be arsed with handset repayments. I thought it would be an el-dodgo, but tis not too bad. I wanted a flip phone, with a camera. And now I have one. Its even my favourite colour. Blue. And its got the same camera pixels and features as a mate at works phone. Only her phone is valued at about $1300.

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

One written last night

So its past 11pm again. And I’m still awake. My insomia is playing up. Ever since last Thursday its been going crazy. I had to wean some mice that were born on the day my grandpa died. I thought I was dealing well with all that has been going on. But its the tiniest things that will throw you into a tailspin.

My flatmate, and best mate in Sydney, is going through something. But I have no idea what it is. Just a week ago we were getting along fine. And now... now I dont know this person. He used to tell me EVERYTHING. Which worked for me. I like this guy, not in a sexual way, but he was easily my best friend in the state.

For the past two nights his ex (who cheated on him something chronic, and is pregnant with someone elses child) has stayed here. As of a week ago, he was still referring to her as "the bitch". And now I have no idea what is going on?!? I asked him about what's going on. He snaps at me, and I can't help but feel that this is somehow none of my business. But I cant stand by and watch him ruin himself. Its not who I am. I have numerous friends advising me to just wait it out. But its the waiting bit thats killing me. I wish I weren't such an emotional retard that I could express myself to him. He's talking to so many other people, so I figure that he's got his safety net in action. But somehow I am no longer a part of it. I feel like I've been wrapped up in my Grandfathers death, and have missed an integral part of a good friends life. So now I must stand my and watch it unfurl.

I feel like I'm losing my closest friend down here, and on top of losing a closely related family member, its too much right now.

4.22am. Need to be at work in three hours

I have had two hours sleep, and have woken up so totally paranoid that I've posted something inappropriate about work. I mean the kind of thing that will get you fired if anybody finds out, which they inevitably would.
So I had to get up and check that I hadn't posted. Now that I'm online I can rememebr discussing certain work and home related issues with a friend on msn before I went to bed.

Sunday, February 19, 2006

Drunken Epiphany #167

There are times when I wonder about the course life has taken me on. I was abused as a child. Its no secret. I'm not proud of it (hey, who would be?), but it really has had such an influence on who I am.

When I was home last, I was shown some pictures of me as a youngster. And OH MY GOD if I didnt have the makings to be the biggest slut this side of the equator. But being abused made me look within myself for the strength to get through day to day. But it also has given me the strength to help everyone around me. This, in turn, has made me less dependant on other people to validate my existance. And as such, I am not the slut that my childhood pictures would make everyone think I am. Instead, I am a well adjusted, emotionally free, extremely indepenandt woman. There is nothing that I cannot do. Or ask someone else to do for me, without thinking that I have to sleep with them as payment. I have the ability to learn. I have always had this ability, but I beleive that if things hads not happened the way it had, then I would have always have been selling myself short. As it currently stands, I can do anything I want. And I am not hindered by what I could have, or should have been.

My abuser is getting marrried this weekend, or last weekend (or sometime around now). I have forgiven him. A long time ago. But not really as much as I have at the moment. At this moment, I am not grateful for what he has done, but I am grateful for the influence of everybody else, who have shaped me because of what has happened, to be the best I can be, and to never expect any less than the best from everybody else.

Ho's before Bro's

So I hooked up with my flatmates' best mate (again) last weekend. Actually he thought he'd get me and my friend, but she wasn't interested. Anyway...

When we got home, the two of us were starting to fool around, and my friend walks straight into my flatmates room and wakes him up. We are trying to keep what we're doing from my flatmate (makes life VERY interesting).

My flatmate's bedroom door, and one of my bedroom doors face each other. So we're standing between these, and we hear very clearly my name and the guys name. I look up at him, swear, and he walks into the flatmates bedroom to do damage control.

So all four of us end up outside, me and my mate sitting on the bonnet of her car talking, and my flatmate and his mate sitting on the steps talking, for about half an hour, maybe more. Then the guy I had hooked up with gets up, and gets into his car to leave. I asked him if he's really going. Yes, yes he is. I'm dumbfounded. I go stand beside my flatmate, and watch him go. My mate goes to to talk to him to get him to come back. Nothing doing.

He drives off. I think, he's gotta be coming back. I call him, his phone's off. I call hang up and redail. Same result. Repeat about 10 times. Finally he picks up.
Me: You coming back
Him: No. (remember this guy is a player here)
Me: WHAT!!!
Him: There's too many people wandering around there at the moment
Me: He's gone to bed
Him: but with all the shit going on at the moment I dont want to risk it
Me: So when then
Him: Next week sometime
Me: *Sexually frustrated* WHEN!!!

So after the converstaion finishes I walk inside. My mate is already on the sofa, out of it.
Her: You must hate me
Me: No, but it was going to be good
Her: You must hate me
Me: Ho's before bros girlie
Her *Laughs*

Anyhoo, I got to thinking the next day. What exactly was this guy talking about when he said 'all the shit that's been going on'. Because I had no idea. My flatmate and I were so close once, and now I have no idea when something major is going on? I know that I've been a bit more reclusive since my Grandpa died, and its normal, but I still feel so bad. I used to be one of the people he would tell everything to, and now that something major is going on, I have no idea?

And now I get no chance to talk to him, because one of his mates has moved in, and she's stolen his TV (which he bought for his kids), and stuck it in her own room. So he spends most of his time in there, and I dont get to really see that much of him.

I was considering buying a new TV to put in the lounge, because I really really dont want to move mine out of my room. That way we can sit in the lounge instead of being locked in our rooms when we want to watch tv. But I really can't afford it.

So I've been making more of an effort to talk to him when he's around. Its only been a day, but I think if I make the same effort I did before to talk to him (its not much really), then we should be able to maintain our friendship.

And tonight I cooked a roast (which I do weekly anyway), and tossed on some extra veggies for him. I was hoping to do a catch up dinner and drinks, but as I was seriving dinner ("You want gravy"), there's a knock at the door. His ex has bought over the kids and wants him to do the whole 'happy family' thing. So he bolts down his dinner, while I'm playing with the kids, and goes out with them all. So there goes that idea. But I figure at least he knows I'm still here to talk to if he needs it.
Its been a week since I posted.

So enjoy this

1. First blog you ever read?
Jeb's. I was put onto it by a good friend of mine, Kezza, who inspired me to start my own blog.

2. What inspired you to start your own?
Hmm, need to think about that for a bit. I needed to start my own blog account to post comments on Kezza's blog

3.The best and worst about blogging?
Best- Getting to know people who live in totally different situations, and finding about their everyday mundane life. It might be boring to them, but I think its hell interesting.

Worst - There's a worst?

4. Who was the first person to comment on your blog?
Probably Kezza

5. What has been your most popular blog entry?
The crab one seemed to get a few laughs


6. If I re-named my blog I would call it...
Saintly Optional. I dont know if I would change it. I like my blog name


7. If my blog had a theme song it would be...
You sound like Louie Badet (the Whitlams)
"And we rolled on in my back shed, played some poker scratched my head, look at the sky and spot the planes, where would I go on holiday, roll with the punches down the ailes and down the streets, the weeks roll by" "all my friends are fuck ups, but they're fun to have around, banana chairs out on the concrete, telling stories to the stars, how geminis love water dragons yeah, and how down the street the weeks roll by". Very wierd and random

8. If my blog was a room it would look like...
A college dorm, complete with bottle collection

9. Five bloggers I would like to have over for dinner.
Kezza, Steph, Zach Braff, Me, and, uhhh... I think I need to stay in more

10. Two bloggers you would like to set up on a blind date?
Me and Kezza, just so we could catch up face to face for a bit

11. Somebody I wish had a blog?
Scott Speedman (Michael from Underworld), I'd let him bite me...

12. If you were only allowed to read one blog ever again, which blog would it be?
Mine, and I'd click all the links

13. Is there a fellow blogger you would like to snog/shag/do rude things to?
I'm sure there is, but I haven't met them yet

14. Discover a blog. Link to a blog that you have recently found, or a blog you have been reading for a while and haven't blogrolled.
I can't link. A little help over here...

Tag Kez!

I also found a link from a linked blog who had linked this from somewhere else. Congratulations Steph, you have managed to get a mention on the cloud, along with bitey the crab...

Sunday, February 12, 2006

I’ve Got CRABS!!!

I went for a drive to get a coffee today and ended up with crabs. Big, fat, hungry crabs. I’ve had them in the past, for quite a while, and it took me ages to get rid of them. And now I’ve been bitten again. Let me explain…

We went to the shopping center one suburb over to get a coffee (very necessary after last nights drinking efforts). Going in we drove past a pet shop, and we (I) decided to go in and see what they had there. I’d had hermit crabs in the past, for a few years actually, and I’ve always wanted them again. So I decided, before I even got into the store, I’d buy more. I got to having a look a them, and whilst deciding which ones I wanted I had two pretty big guys on my hand, wallet in the other. And one of them decides its hungry and the skin on my hand looks taaasty.

So here I am, with one hand full of crabs (how often do you get to say that in your lifetime), and the other full of wallets and keys, one crab biting me, and my friend too scared to come near me to empty my OTHER hand so I can remove said biter. By the time I managed to get the shop girl to take my possessions he had a more than firm hold. So here I am, tapping on this crab, blowing on him, and trying to pull him off without taking half the skin off my palm. One of the shop girls suggests dunking my hand, with attached crab, into the fish tank next to me. No response from bitey, except to take a firmer grip. Cue the toe curling and wincing. We waited a little longer. Still no response. We tried sliding a card under him to lever him off. Didn’t work. Meanwhile, I have fish all over my hand, leading me to believe that I’ve been bleeding in the water. And it stings enough to back me up too. Five minutes later I’m still waiting for this thing to drop off. But the good news is that the fish tank water is cold enough that I can’t feel my hand. I have quite a few ‘observers’, and have managed to convince a child that she should also get crabs. Though not Bitey.

One of the shop girls comes over. She’s rung a vet to see if there’s anything we can do to get it off. He recommends waiting. Five more minutes pass, with pleasant conversation and the occasional wince as Bitey repositions his grip. Finally he starts to move. I grab him and drag him off. Out shoots the OTHER claw to get a grip. It closes down and I think “No way buster”, still pulling and eventually giving him a small prize of a piece of skin. He gets tossed back into the tank where he curls up exhausted. Bitey must be a guy. Once he’s done its straight to sleep and bugger the world.

I am now missing the top layer of skin, approximately the size of my little finger nail, at the base of my left little finger.

Needless to say I didn’t get Bitey, but I now have three small crabs.

I never said I was sane.

Monday, February 06, 2006

1. Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 18, and find line 4.
"At toyota, we're here for the long run." OK so I'm looking at buying a new car.

2. Stretch your left arm out as far as you can. Where are your fingers?
at the end of my left arm

3. what is the last thing you watched on TV?
Umm. I think it was wedding crashers, yesterday sometime.

4. Without looking guess what time it is.?
9.55

5. Now look at the clock. What is the actual time.
9:56. Yeah, I looked when I was reading this on someone else's blog

6. Besides the computer, what else can you hear?
Music. From my computer...

7. When did you last step outside? What were you doing?
About 1 hour 30 min ago. Throwing some meat scraps out on the back lawn for the birds.

8. Before you started this survey, what did you look at?
a BLOG. Nobuddy's bizness. (Sorry, can't link)

9.What are you wearing?
Clothes

10. Did you dream last night?
I suppose I did, but I don't remember it unless its really really screwed up

11. When did you last laugh?
Reading Steph's blog. about 20 minutes ago. She cracks me up

12. What is on the walls of the room you are in?
Pale blue paint, pale pink edging, and cracks. Yes. Its a rental house.

13. Seen anything weird lately?
You have no idea

14. What do you think of this quiz?
Its more interesting than it should be. But drying paint can be made interesting by the addtion of alcomohol.

15. What is the last film you saw?
Wedding crashers

16. If you became a multi-millionaire overnight, what would you buy?
A boy toy

17. If you could change one thing about the world, regardless of guilt or politics, what would you do?
I'd relocate myself back to QLD so I could be with the love of my life

18. Do you like to dance?
Oh hell yes. Starting official lessons tomorrow in fact.

19. George W. Bush is
a moron. If I took him seriously I'd be an idiot too

20. Imagine your first child is a girl, what do you call her?
Karigan. She's a fiesty girl from one of my favouriter novels. Her spunk get her through all of her trials *SIGH* If only life were that easy. Hang on...

21. Imagine your first child is a boy, what do you call him?
Why am I answering these questions? I dont want children.

22. Would you ever consider living abroad? Part of my life plan.