So its past 11pm again. And I’m still awake. My insomia is playing up. Ever since last Thursday its been going crazy. I had to wean some mice that were born on the day my grandpa died. I thought I was dealing well with all that has been going on. But its the tiniest things that will throw you into a tailspin.
My flatmate, and best mate in Sydney, is going through something. But I have no idea what it is. Just a week ago we were getting along fine. And now... now I dont know this person. He used to tell me EVERYTHING. Which worked for me. I like this guy, not in a sexual way, but he was easily my best friend in the state.
For the past two nights his ex (who cheated on him something chronic, and is pregnant with someone elses child) has stayed here. As of a week ago, he was still referring to her as "the bitch". And now I have no idea what is going on?!? I asked him about what's going on. He snaps at me, and I can't help but feel that this is somehow none of my business. But I cant stand by and watch him ruin himself. Its not who I am. I have numerous friends advising me to just wait it out. But its the waiting bit thats killing me. I wish I weren't such an emotional retard that I could express myself to him. He's talking to so many other people, so I figure that he's got his safety net in action. But somehow I am no longer a part of it. I feel like I've been wrapped up in my Grandfathers death, and have missed an integral part of a good friends life. So now I must stand my and watch it unfurl.
I feel like I'm losing my closest friend down here, and on top of losing a closely related family member, its too much right now.
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