Monday, March 17, 2008

I really don't like banana's

Really. When that cyclone went through north Queensland and wiped out the banana crops I must have been the only Aussie who didn’t give a damn. I mean, yeah. I cared about the farmers. But as far is it affected me… well, it didn’t.

I very rarely eat bananas as is. I might eat two per year. Thats one individual banana every six months. In a good year. In fact, the most common way for me to eat a banana is drowned in thick, sugary vanilla custard. Or in a smoothie where banana isn’t the predominant taste.

I buy bananas to put in my fruit salad. And then its only because I use that fruit salad to make smoothies. I had two in my fridge for a little longer than I should have kept them. A friend suggested that I mash them up to make a banana sundae with a twist. And I thought, ‘Hell YEAH’. I mean, even I like banana sundaes.

So I did. I mished and mashed, and warmed the banana up ever so slightly. And put heaps of creamy vanilla icecream over the top, with caramel sauce and a sprinkling of nuts.

And it was gross.

One banana down, one more to go. Tonight I attempted to do something a little different. I thought that if I mixed the banana with a bit of nutella it would be better.

So I did. I mished and mashed, and warmed the banana up ever so slightly. I mixed in a generous amount of nutella and put heaps of icecream on top. And I sat down to eat it.

Fucking DISGUSTING!!! The warm squishy banana mixed withoily nut flavoured chocolate just felt slimy. I could barely gag down the first mouthful. I ended up eating the icecream and leaving the brown goo. Only by the time I’d finished. The brown goo had a grey sheen to it from the melted icecream. I half expected a golgothan to rise from it.

I really don’t like bananas. Next time I’m gonna throw the fuckers out.

6 comments to “I really don’t like banana’s.”

  1. Or milkshakes are good too- chocolate, peanut butter banana mmmmm…

    I would have suggested making banana bread.

  2. I’m okay with bananananana’s myself, although I hate typing the word, as I usually forget how many A’s and N’s I’ve typed in the middle so it comes out looking all screwy. The best thing to do with old ones though is cake, or bread. And I can’t eat them in public… Phallic fruit and I, do not a comfortable looking partnership make!
  3. I just cannot stand them.
    Not the flavour.
    Not the texture.
    Not the squishy-ness.

    I am so with you on the anti-banana thing.

    Just makes my tummy go all *blargh*

    Oh - and my Mum always uses the reallllly ripe bananas to make her banana cakes… actually, those are the only things that are banana that I can eat. Would you like the recipe?

  4. Okay do you ever make banana bread? That’s a good way to use up the over ripe bananas. Also, soemtimes I slice them up thin and put them on a peanutbutter sandwich and then grill the entire thing.
  5. I cannot deny the phallic intrigue of the banana.
  6. Princess - Mmm. Sounds like a yummy recipe. Pity my blender is crap. I’d end up with chunk of slimy banana all through it and penut butter on the bottom :(

    Kez - that’s cuz you’d rather a real phallic object!

    MissE - I HATE banana cake!

    Prof - what is it with the Northern Americans having penut butter and banana. I’ve never even heard of that combo!

    Josh - mmm. phallic intrigue.

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