Friday, November 28, 2008

Adventures of Retardogirl

Damn. Friday mornings suck sometimes. A long, grinding week and you have no brain function left. And I'm no exception.

This morning I was asked to do a simple task - roll up a floor mat and take it up to reception. Easy right? Not for Retardogirl its not!

I dragged said matt up to reception. Greeted the security guard, swiped my ID card and tugged at the door. When it didn't open, I put my weight behind it, pulling with my full 85kg. And nearly fell arse over tit when it didn't open.

Realising I had to push the door, I proceeded to do so. Leaning up against the door to try to open it. The security guard was almost pissing himself laughing as he offered to get the door for me. Retardogirl didn't realise she needed to swipe again.

So I swiped and opened the door, dragging the matt through behind me. Red faced, I dumped it under the desk and turned to run away in shame. Only to get two steps and be yanked backwards as my ID card and lanyard got tangled in the drawstring of the bag. As I bent down to untangle it I managed to make a semi redeeming pun about needing a weekend, before I turned and fled.

Nearly knocking myself out on the door that was closing behind me...

9 comments:

Greyhound Girl said...

Oh my god- well what a great way to end the week! You deserve a weekend after all that!

yrautca said...

That security guard was so hitting on you :)

The Mutant said...

Dear Retardogirl,

I heart you and your crazy misadventures!

Ha ha, but seriously though: Ha ha ha. You poor dear, by the sounds of that you've well and truly earned your weekend! Have no fear though tomorrow is a new week and a new beginning, plus you've now captured the attention of a security guard - I hope he's hot and young and studly because you've got the perfect opener with him now. Remember embarrassment is only embarrassing if you let it get to you!

*~Dani~* said...

That actually sounds like it took some talent. Don't feel bad - we all have days like that. That's what blogs are made of, right?

Clyde said...

Everyone has to have an unco daHey, are you sure the security dude wasn't hitting on you
Ah, a man with taste

Effortlessly Average said...

Personally I'd find that so charmingly humorous that I'd be irrestably attracted to you.

Ms Smack said...

Surely that guy could have made it easier for you eh?

I have dopey days like that honey, don't beat yourself up about it, however amusing it is for us LOL.

I catch my skirt in the door, get hair ties caught in hair, smudge my mascara and no one tells me, all sorts of embarassing stuff.

:)

unique_stephen said...

Sounds like you should change your name to Steph

Josh said...

I don't guess there's any footage of this, is there?