Wednesday, January 28, 2009


I've changed the name of my blog. Its no longer what it was. I fall over too much. And I did it again today. But it must have been hilarious. I mean, to watch, not to experience.

I was bored. I had nothing to do for a total of about 3 minutes. So I decided to run up and down the halls. Now, I should point out that I thought this was a great core workout. Especially since my shoes are wrapped in two layers of plastic at the time. No traction means that I have to work extra hard to stay upright.

Um. I didn't think that one through. I have enough trouble staying upright. Sober. In flats. In hindsight, I was destined to stack it.

So I'm running up the hallway. Flat out. And I approach the end, and decide to stop. I slam on the metaphorical brakes. Slowing, slowing. Stopped.

I transferred my weight onto my leading foot, ready to step into a walk. Turns out I wasn't really stopped, I was merely halted by the plastic wrapped around my foot. And as I transferred the weight forward, the plastic broke.

My foot slid straight through the overshoe, and straight under the trolley I had 'stopped' in front of. I went down on one knee, with my leading shin smacking into the trolley, sending it careering into the wall. A god almighty crash echoed down the hallway.

I leapt up. There were people working in each room at that end of the hallway. How could they have not heard it? I replaced my broken overshoe, and nonchelantly left the scene.

Am I retarded if no one saw it?


Josh said...

You are now you told us. Spaz.

Anonymous said...


Hahhah ;)

The Mutant said...

If a spaz falls in the hallway and no one is around to hear her, is she still a spaz?

Considering its now on the internerd for all the world to see, I say YES!

Oh, and I'm so loving the new name of your blog. Reminds me of myself when I was a young girl!

Epskee said...

Love the change. Love Bubble wrap.

And no, if you retard when nobody sees, you aren't a real tard.

Spazziness is compounded exponentially by witnesses. Did't you learn that equation in maths at school?

Pearl said...

If a tard falls in a fallway but no one sees, is you still a tard?
Regrettably, yes. But one that writes well!

fingers said...

I'm sorry.
Why are your shoes wrapped in plastic...

phishez said...

Josh - man whore!

Kate - it was pretty funny.

Mutant - when you come up for Mardi Gras we'll make bubble wrap crowns and spray paint them gold.

Epskee - woot! That equation is a get out of jail free card!

Pearl - Ooh, a compliment. Feel free to post those whenever you want!

Fingers - I was working in a clean area. It keeps shoe dirt away from that which needs to stay clean.

Anonymous said...

But of course not! I once careened down a three-storey marble flight of stairs in Germany when wearing only socks in my feet. Battered, bruised and unable to walk properly, I congratulated myself on having done so secretly.

Anonymous said...

If nobody saw it, then it didn't happen.

Clyde said...

Nope, no one saw it so it didn't happen----
Hmmm, shoes in plastic---why not disposable slip ons like on a plane ?

Ms Smack said...

Well, THIS tells me that the dream about shoes earlier was obviously a sign to be careful on your shoes, woman.

Yes, you're still a spaz, but I love you.


yrautca said...

If you do that wearing just a bikini and sell it on the internet, you wouldnt have to work another day in your life.

Cazzie!!! said...

OMG, Steph, be careful woman, take it easy, LOL @ the name of the blog.