Saturday, November 18, 2006

The aftermath

My jaw is swollen beyond regonition. Take a look at my profile pic. My normall round-to-heart-shaped face is normal above the cheekbones. But below... I have a jaw that rivals Paris Hiltons. One side is worse than the other. Obviously. The swelling is actually really low down. So where Paris' jaw goes out in lumpy bits, one side of mine goes down!

I'm bruised on one side of my mouth. And under my tongue. I still can't really talk. I don't even talk to myself anymore. Now nobody talks to me :(

Still having difficulty eating. Had to turn my planned chicken fillet last night into chicken nuggets, just to fit it in my mouth. I had Hungry Jacks for dinner that night. Hadn't eaten since morno tea time and needed something to dilute the blood I'd swallowed. Hungry Jacks was the softest fast food I could think of. So having to squish my burger into a pancake, taking tiny tiny bites out of one side of my mouth, and fastidiously chewing on one side... it took me half an hour just to eat my damn burger!

Oh. Big news coming up. Stay tuned folks.

4 comments:

Steph said...

Oh ya poor thing. I feel for you.
Best to eat the mushy stuff for a while.

Anonymous said...

feel better soon. oh, and hi!

mist1 said...

I have never scrutinized Ms. Hilton's face. Now, I am curious about the lumpy part.

phishez_rule said...

Yeah, turns out having stitches in your mouth is a bastard asking for all kinds of trouble. I ripped them out this morning (note to self, that shit hurts), but since then have stopped playing with the gaping hole in my jaw. I'm sure it will be all good in the long run.

Steph - Any excuse to eat green jelly

Brooklyn - Hi! Welcome to the twisted inner workings of my mind. Been lurking here long?

Mist - I haven't scrutinised it either. They jump out at you and assault your eyeballs! How do you miss that?