Blogfodder

Have any other bloggers experienced this phenomenon? Where you are in a situation that is maximum frustration, irritation or ‘must not choke someone’, and all you can think is ‘Blogfodder’? This is one such experience.

a.k.a ‘How to have a cheap night out’

The CHEAPEST. Let me start at the beginning. Because, as Julie Andrews sings, it’s a damn good place to start. We had big plans for last night. We were going out to dinner again. Pancakes. Such a healthy dinner. Then go home, get ready and go. We were going to a Latino bar. I’ve never been but I luurve me the dancing. So we decided it was about time. And since Rach was down, we’d take her out and show her a unique experience. Unique being the correct word.

While Rach was in the shower doing the whole shaving thing, I decided to call my sister. And the course of our conversation started at Christmas presents, and what I wanted. It was pointless asking what anybody else wanted cuz I’ve already done my shopping. I want vouchers. Let me buy my own stuff thanks. For clothes, or sex toys. Either way I’m one very satisfied chickie. Then it went on to what she’d bought the parentals. Turns out she’d bought him a magic bullet. It’s a blender thingy, but seeing as we’d just been discussing ‘toys’ my mind screamed blue bloody murder. She bought him a WHAT?!?

Then it went to parentals and sex toys. Natural progression I swear. I’ll leave it up to Jana to blog that one. And the conversation ceased. Time for me to get ready.

I jump out of the shower and get ready. Dress, shoes, makeup, hair curled. And drinking. Takes long enough but I’m finally ready to go. We wander out the door and head to the train station. On the wander my housemate and I… well the crazy was definitely showing. I told her about the conversation with my sister. And then in the next breath, started singing nursery rhymes. The poor guy behind us couldn’t cross the road fast enough.

No trains running from Parramatta. That’s fine. We can live with that. We catch the free bus to Granville and await the train there. We wait. And we wait. And we wait some more. One of my workmates wanders by, and she sits down and we start chatting.

And still we wait.

Finally there comes an announcement. All trains are delayed. Indefinitely. Uh, ok. It’s not so bad for us. My workmate lives in the city and now has no way to get home. Except by Taxi. BIG $$$. Poor girl. She just wanted to have dinner with another workmate and go home.

Its now 11.30 on a Saturday night and we’re stuck at Granville. We opt to share a taxi into the city. Will cost us all of about $12, maybe $15 each. But there are five of us. And we’d need a maxi taxi. We call the taxi company to order one. The server is busy. We try the other taxi company. Same deal. Maxi taxi pulls up at the taxi stand. ACROSS THE ROAD. We run but it’s gone. So we wait. And we call the company. And we discover Rach’s phone, which was clipped to the top of her dress, is missing.

We spot it at the same time as some random guy picks it up. Oh No He Didn’t. Drunk Phishy calmly walks up to him and informs him that its not his phone, it belongs to my friend. He’s a little thrown. I’m obviously tipsy, and he’s just scored a free phone, but I’m not going to leave without it. He hands it over and I give him big grin and thank him, complete with verbal barbie head flip.

It’s now past midnight. My workmate can’t hang around forever waiting for a taxi that might not show. And our club closes at 2. It’ll be 1 by the time we get into the city. So we decide to go our separate ways. We catch a bus back to Parramatta and they catch their taxi.

On the bus trip back we are sitting on three consecutive seats, a double each, in an empty bus. A bunch of people get on, straight from the footy. Oblivious to the completely empty bus surrounding us, one of them breaches public transport etiquette and picks the seat next to Robyn. This guy resembled a drunken jack-o-lantern, complete with full sized Aussie flag. And proceeded to chat her up. She was standing to get off the bus about 3 minutes before it approached the station.

And we walked home, watched movies and ate chips. Dressed to the nines. Looking absolutely stunning. All sitting on my bed. An eventful Saturday night.

The only reason I didn’t cry (apart from the fact I was completely wasted) was the thought that I could blog it.

Blogfodder.