Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Things that make you go WTF!?!

I have two very pretty dresses. Amazingly pretty dresses. They are my 'first date dress' and my 'second date dress'. My second date dress is just a flattering as the first, if not a tad formal and old fashioned. But its gorgeous and I've had more comments about this dress than the other. I swear I want my wedding dress modelled on this dress. Where the first is flirty/pretty, this one is classic-gorgeous. I swear I could wear prostitue red lipstick and not look slutty in this dress.

But I have no occasion to wear these dresses. So I've worn them yesterday and today. First and second respectively.

I went to the allergy clinic at work today. All dressed up. I looked like a literal lady. Like your grandma but much, much younger. I'm used to the drill at the clinic. And so when my name got called I went with the murse and jumped on the scales. Since I was there six months ago I've put on 2.7 kilos. According to those scales. And the murse made the very stupid comment 'you've put on weight' and then he actually TUTTED at me! Fucker was lucky I didn't immediately leap over the scales and tear his eyeballs out! I might have looked like a lady but I was a little scrag kid and I lived in the country for three years. I can hold my own.

For the record guys: there are two subjects you CANNOT discuss with women. Age and weight. End of story. Participation is at your own risk and possible consequences include having your testicles confiscated. You have been officially warned.

9 comments:

mist1 said...

Scales are for fishies (phishez). Still, I avoid them.

poody said...

LOL I went to the Dr for a physical this morning. Got a pap smear and my boobs felt up for Valentine's day! I too was heavy on the scales. The nurse was nice and said why are you here today and I said I am trying to kill myself slowly with food! She kind of laughed like she didn't know if I was serious or not.

Cazzie!!! said...

Bloody hell, how unprofessional of that nurse..he needs a good going over...in my own honest nurse opinion!!!
Where'd ya buy that dress from? I can't believe they made a dress that put the stripes the right ways.

Steph said...

You should have tut tutted his nuts into outer space.

Sometimes Saintly Nick said...

I never discuss age or weight with a lady-unless it is my weight and age.

phishez_rule said...

Mist - I'm a naked phish. I function better without scales too.

Poody - You got a hell of alot more than I did for VD. I like that excuse.

Cazzie - It was a store called big city chic.

Steph - I was too stunned

Nick - you's well learned

Professor said...

he is, and pardon my french and i know im breaking my own resolution, but he is quite the fuckingasshole!!!!!!

that being said, I want to see you in the dresses! post pics! i need a dress- i own skirts that make me look like a ...teacher.

neko said...

so, ima girl and i dont mind telling people about my age or weight.

^_^

yeah, show the other dress! i havnt owned any dresses since i was in highschool.. would like to change that.

phishez_rule said...

Neko - I'm open to discuss it with people I KNOW. Really, really well. But a total stranger is another thing. And yes. There will be more pics of the dresses.