Wednesday, March 07, 2007

When I was a kid

  • When I was a kid pretty much every photo that was taken of me showed my underwear. I have a beautiful picture of me with my sisters cat, in a nurses outfit, with yellow underwear. Some things never change.

  • When I was a kid I had a massive crush on Jonathan Brandis. He was teh shit in Seaquest DSV. He's the only actor I've ever written a letter to. I wanted to use scented paper, but we had none, so I sprayed a heap of pink paper with some perfume. I rejected about 10 pieces because they had 'driplets' on them. I even wrote a draft. And I literally just learnt that he died.

  • When I was a kid I once peed in my shoe. We were on a farm somewhere (I think) and I had squatted down to take a leak. When you're wearing slides and you do such a thing your heels come out of your shoes. I didnt realise until I stood up again. "Mum my toes are wet" kind of thing.

  • When I was a kid I once cut my hair in class. I was flirting with my very first crush and he dared me. And then he cut his hair, and I cut mine again etc etc. I ended up with no fringe on the left side of my face. I don't remember Mums reaction, but my teacher was horrified.

  • When I was a kid I used to love to climb trees. Still do in fact.We used to climb the tree in the back yard and walk about on the carport. I was devastated when they cut off the branch we used to get up. Even though it was to make space for Nan to come live in the back yard.

  • When I was a kid I was 'engaged'. My first boyfriend was a friend of the family. I was about five or six, and we used to play 'motorbikes' at recess. Or kiss chasey.

  • One day we were visiting said boy and all us kids went for a walk. On the way up the back lane (not a metaphor, no jokes here please) we went past their feral neighbours house. The feral neighbour threw a chunk of wood at me and it hit on on the scalp line, on my right forehead. A few of the boys headed off after this asshat, and the rest of them followed pretty quickly when they saw I was bleeding.

  • My first 'kiss' was with a boy named Jamie, who's dad owned the produce store around the corner from Mum and Dads shop. Me, my brother and sister, Jamie were playing in the grass at the back of the superarket my parents owned. My sibings egged us into it. I was about five. And no. It wasn't a pash. Just a lip to lip kiss, kinda like you'd kiss your sister.

  • Whenever we visited anyone when I was a kid you could guarantee that after routine hello's I'd be straight out with the animals, playing with dogs, or curled up with the cats on someone's bed.

  • When I was a kid I never wanted to wear a bra. We had a techer at high school that had HUUGE hanging knockers. Picture a EE, but at her bellybutton. My sister told me that if I didn't wear a bra I would end up with boobs like hers. I've worn a bra almost every single day since then.

  • One of my friends from pre-school was my Agriculture buddy in Years 11 and 12. Together we topped the class. One of my besties to this day went to Primary school with me. Even though half way through Primary school I moved interstate and didn't see her until High School, where we ended up being satellite friends of the same group. She lived in England for a year or two, and I've moved interstate twice since then.

  • And last but very not least, when I was very young I had a bout of diarrhoea. It was pretty full on, but I was fascinated by how much there was! The next day I went up to a guy (of about 16) who worked at my parents shop, and told him 'Dood, I had diarrheoa last night and it was thiiis much', while at the same time cupping both hands together to show him. To this day my brother hangs shit on me for it. All he has to do is cup his hands and give that evil, evil grin, and I start screaming obscenities at him. Buut now that I've blogged it, he's got nothing on me. NOTHING!!!

I haven't changed much have I?

Seeing as this was a tag, I shall also tag.

And I choose...






Minimum 10 dot points about you, as a kid.


Cazzie!!! said...

I am lmao :)

mist1 said...

I cut my hair in class too. On picture day.

Steph said...

Ah good times. Any recollections that involve pee and poo always makes me smile ;)

Me said...

Hmmm...I'll do this soon. :)

I loved Jonathan Brandis too!!!

Crushed by Ingsoc said...

Never having been on your blog before, ten points about me as a child seems...personal.
But here goes.
1. I used to eat wax crayons.
2. I used to hide my toys when I broke them, because I thought breaking things would always get you into trouble.
3. I used to go wandering the school till 'returned' by teachers to my class. No one had noticed I'd have gone.
4. I used to lock my brother in the shed regularly- he always fell for it.
5. The kid nextdoor, who I played with, died in a car crash when he was 19.
6. I was about eight before I stopped going into the girls toilets at school.
7. I seem to have spent a lot of time standing on a chair with my hands on my head.
8. I had to sleep with a lamp on for a long time.
9. I used to piss in the bath.
10. I used to regard McDonalds as a treat.
Sad, isn't it?
Arrive derche

poody said...

When I was 5 yrs old my sister was a toddler and walking about the house.. Anyways one day I was eating fried chicken and being a kid I would pick up stuff off the floor and eat it. I thought I was picking up some crust that had fallen off the chicken but much to my surprise when I put it in my mouth it was a turd that had fallen out of my sister's diaper. I learned 2 things that day 1- never put anything in your mouth off the floor 2- I know what shit tastes like! in my family if someone says this tastes like shit then they always say I don't know let's ask Mary!

Professor said...

I LOVED this!!!! And thanks for the tag! I'm so all over this one! Loved you stories- you are such a neat person!

Dan said...

When I was a kid I used to love to climb trees. Still do in fact.

This was a very sweet post! And hey ... I love the fact that you still do things that you did when you were a kid. I still consider myself a kid and always will.

Don't ever lose that kid in you. Ever! :)

RKM said...

When I was a kid I fell out of a car travelling at 100km/h on a highway. I was subsequently run over by following traffic and spent six months or so in a coma. It was the fact that I was a kid that saved me, according to the docs. Supple bones and amazing resotrative powers via an immune system that had yet to be fucked up by the things that fuck us up as adults.

I remember the fall and I remember the first car hitting me. I remember the glazed look in my father's eys as I was being lifted into the back of an ambulance. And that's it.

Nothing for six months. And other than an occassional very slightly drooping left eye, especially when I'm tired - and a dashing scar, also above my left eye, that looks more like fencing wound than a falling-from-fast-moving-vehicle injury, I am fine.

Sort of.

Trundling Grunt said...

Brilliant - I love all the rally stupid things we did as kids for the simple reason "they dared me". When did we stop?

phishez_rule said...

Cazzie - I aim to entertain

Mist - And I bet you looked very special too

Steph - yeah. the whole blogoshere knows

Me - good. Can't wait to see it

Ingsoc - I'm sure that will explain alot as I get to know you

Poody - we had kids as a pet. So we all just knew not to eat anything off the floor. Sadly I had a mate pick up a 'saltana' from her floor when she owned a rat.

Prof - Ta!

Dan - the day I do is the day I need nappies again. Kind of ironic

Rkm - you fell out of a car? thats talent

Grunt - I always use that excuse when I kiss boys.

Josh said...

Sorry I haven't replied sooner... I've been terribly busy the last few days. I've blogged extensively about by childhood, especially in my "V-Files" series of posts, but just for you, here are ten things about me as a child:

1. I used to pinch the butts of all my other classmates, boys and girls, when I was in 1st grade. I had a reputation as a butt-pincher.

2. My favorite thing to do at recess when I was in elementary school was to go to the far end of the playground, where the honeysuckle grew, and stand in the shade and drink the dew from the flowers.

3. I used to play video games so much as a kid that I got calluses on my fingers, especially my thumbs.

4. I didn't drink sodas until I was in high school. Tended to only drink water or milk.

5. I was traumatized by my own mother when she likened the rabbit that my dad had convinced me into tasting to the rabbit Thumper from the movie "Bambi".

6. I got choked on a piece of tomato when I was about 4 years old, causing me to hurl and convincing me that I was allergic to tomatoes. I wouldn't start eating them again until late high school/early college.

7. I used to keep a collection of my favorite wooden sticks, and would spend hours outside playing with them, pretending they were staffs, magic wands, scythes, etc.

8. When I was 4, I once complained to my mother that I was disappointed that a particular soap opera did not "show the naked man."

9. I once owned a large amount of both Smurf and He-Man paraphernalia. (I went for both extremes I guess.)

10. I used to amuse my friends in the cafeteria by hyperventilating on purpose and seeing stars for a few moments. This continued through elementary school until one day when I blacked out and fell out of my chair.