I wonder about myself sometimes. I really do.
I wasn't going to post tonight but this was too good to pass up. My phone was going absolutely nuts today. I was texting Cute Dancer Boy, the Gay Biotch and Whatawaste. I also had my phone actually ring (it never rings, EVAH). Not once, but TWICE. And they both went to message bank. One was my Dad, the other was the optometrist. My new contacts were in. Hurrah! I've been wearing my glasses for about a month now, so I desperately needed them. I trundled off to pick them up and grab some sushi for dinner.
Oh, how I love sushi!
Anyhoo, when I got home I chucked the contacts in so they could settle before I went off to dancing. And on the drive to dancing I noticed things were a little blurry. Not dangerously so, it was just a bit difficult to focus on street signs. 'Hmm', I thought, 'thats odd.' And I just put it down to it being night and my eyes adjusting to the contacts.
I get home and drag Boots into the bathroom to wash her chin. She's got feline acne again. And while I'm in there she knocks my new contacts boxes into the sink. I pick them up after I'm done with her, and try to put them back together. I can only find one set of right contacts. I search around a bit. Maybe she's knocked it onto the floor.
No. Not on the floor. Look, there's the box of left contacts...
The FULL box of left contacts. Which means...
I'd put two right contacts in.
Its bloody hard to see straight sometimes.
15 comments:
Ha! I figured out the punch line long before I got to it! My ex-wife used to were two of the same eye contacts on a regular basis. I think that was ‘cause she could she nothing without contacts and was too vain to wear glasses, even when alone in the bathroom.
I've been wearing glasses since i was 9. I tried contacts twice. Both times failed miserably. I have never regretted it one bit. But I do understand what u're going through. It's tough, sometimes.
hahahahah, this reminds me of Mr Magoo for some reason. hahah, lucky you didn't crash into anything!
Phish...You crack me up. hehehe. Now that is funny.
How was the shushi?
Oh and "The First Time" a few posts back...IS SO HOT! Um...I am so going to have to bring an extra pair of panties if I'm going to read you...whew.
Ciao babes and thanks for the smut. I loved it. More please...soon??? later babes.
I am guessing you have a collection of odd socks too?
I knew someone who was notorious for putting contacts in the wrong eyes.
Every three months she would get to the end of her supply of disposable contacts and there would be a handful of odd ones left over.
She wondered why she got head aches all the time...a true rocket scientist that one.
And that's why I don't wear contacts as it isn't very bright in the mornings and neither am I.
Btw, you write very fine erotica. I'm just about down to room temperature
Welcome to my world. My life is one embarrassing moment after another.
So, are you sure that was the cat you washed, Mrs Magoo...
oh dude, did that not hurt your eyes?
I'm a sushi lover too....yum.
your cat has acne? huh?
know what you mean about the phone never ringing. It surprises me and I get all excited when people actually CALL my phone, rather than just texting it. Even I get tired of being the text queen every once and a while...
I often put my boxers on inside out, believe it or not.
I carry absent mindedness to an art form.
that is so something I would totally do! And I hope you had a grand time dancing!
Nick - you're just a smarty pants then!
Itelli - I tried contacts about 10 years ago. And I couldn't stand them. They were the hard ones and they felt like they stuck to my eyelid. I took them out after three minutes and refused, point blank, to put them back in. It took 8 years before I could be convinced to try them again. They've come a long way.
Betty - did you and fingers collaborate on this one?
SZJ - ok. I'll post just for you.
Josh - how did you know about my odd socks?
Grunt - I wear the ones that stay in for 30 days and nights. Beats the hell out of trying to poke yourself in the eye when you can barely open it!
Bug - It makes for a good blog though!
Fingers - You and Betty need to straighten out your stories. First I'm Mr Magoo and now I'm Mrs?
Oestre - they were only in for a few hours.
Stacy - We're soul sistas we are.
Kelly - Geez, my phone has been going nuts lately. I kinda asked out Cute Dancer Boy.
Ingsoc - sounds like a very abstract art form. I like to say I do blow jobs as my art.
Prof - I did. I always do!
Have you ever considered Lasik? A friend of mine had it done and he was amazed at the difference. He used to be blind as a bat, but now he can see pretty damn well.
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