Monday, May 07, 2007

How to put things in perspective.

a.k.a How injured nipples make you forget stuff

Yes people. You read right! I have injured myself. I was putting a heavy package on a shelf that was chest height. As I dropped said package on said shelf, I gave it a shove with my shoulder to simultaneously put it into place. And somehow managed to pinch a teensy bit of skin between said package and galvanised steel shelf.

I now have sympathy for guys who get tiny snatches of skin stuck in their flies.

Fucker bled and all! Now I'm worried. What if it gets infected and my nipple falls off? I'll be a freak with huge knockers but only one nipple! Thats worse than a freak with three nipples. I could use that as a pick up line. "I've only got one nipple, wanna see?" Time to join the circus me thinks.

I need someone to kiss it better.


poody said...

well it would make you stand out in a crowd!

Brooklyn Frank said...

i'm sure the circus will welcome you with open arms!

Webmiztris said...

omg, I'm cringing just at the thought!!!!!

no more nekkid putting stuff away for YOU! ;)

Lowry said...

I'll help it feel better ;)

Jay said...

That's a very sad story. I hope it has a speedy recovery. Shall I send it flowers?

Cazzie!!! said...

Ouch, fukkin things get in the way...better still, just cut the other one off.

Jobe said...

I hate to scare you but no man will come within 10 feet of a chick with a deformed nipple.

Even if you cover it up we know.

Desirea Madison said...


Chucky said...

holy cow lady!

That's crazy. yes, zippers can be bad. That is why you will never see any boxers with a zipper!

I hope it doesn't fall off. What will you do with it if it does fall off? Put it in your pocket? Maybe make a key ring out of it? will you grow another one kinda like teeth?

So many unknowns...

Hope it feels better!

Natalia said...

I don't think your nipple will fall off. Nipples are fairly resilient even if they hurt. Mine have been a few times. Inconsiderate or overzealous lovers...and one operation. They bounce back, luv.



mist1 said...

When I was a kid, a friend of mine nearly had his nipple ripped of in the chain on the swingset.

It always looked a little weird after that, but he was so hot, it really didn't matter.

Chuck said...


Fark me twice and call me Sandy, that sound painful!!!

I send a e-kiss to help you out, hon.


phishez_rule said...

Poody - Well, the freak with only half nipple stag is hard to miss

Frank - I'll call them when they come back to town

Webmiztris - I heart nekkid, but I wasn't this time. I swear it!

Lowry - all assistance appreciated

Jay, I think it would need Lowry's kind of 'feel good' to help it recover

Cazzie - I'm a bit too attached to them

Jobe - shit

Desi - yeah. Ouch just about covers it

Chucky - keychain sounds good. Makes it easier to nip-slip though

Natalia - I'm not sure if the inconsiderate or the overzealous lover would be worse

Mist - good to know

Sandy - yes, it hurt.

Josh said...

Hope your nipple has a speedy recovery. (Thought I'd never type THAT in any context anywhere...)

LiSh said...

just coz i didn't do a nippled (thank fook) doesn't mean i don't sympathise... a 80cm tv on arm skin isn't pleasant either